NEW TO DVD APRIL 14, 2008

NEW TO DVD TUESDAY, APRIL 14, 2008

AVP:Requiem (Alien vs. Predator: Requiem) – UR- Starring Steven Pasquale, John Ortiz, Johnny Lewis, and Ariel Gade. Sci-Fi. Ah, yes, another in the Alien series. Or the Predator series. Or the Alien and Predator series. Unlike so many runaway sequels, especially number…. 7 (I think 9 if you count Predator and Predator 2) this one isn’t terrible. It’s actually quite good. The special effects are good and the acting isn’t horrible, although not vying for any Academy awards. The story line is actually original, and it truly is a sequel, not just more of the same story. A Predator is bringing home a dead Predator and a couple of facehugger thingys on a ship back to their home planet after winning their “game,” but soon discover the dead Predator wasn’t really dead. Actually infested with an Alien, it pops out and it kills the pilot, resulting in a crash landing somewhere in Colorado (why do aliens tend to flock to tiny hick towns?). Before dying, the Predator pilot sends out a distress signal to his home planet. Now this newly hatched thing is an Alien Predator hybrid, I’ll now call PredAlien. The facehugger thingys escape and kill two hunters in the forest. Meanwhile, Predators are on their way to earth to rectify this disaster. Needless to say, PredAlien and the facehuggers manage to wreak havoc on this little town, and Dallas (Pasquale), a recently released convict, and his former best friend turned sheriff (Oritiz), are on a mission to save the day. The National Guard is called in and tries to “help.” There is a lot of action, gore, and some language. Like I said, the acting is OK. I didn’t really care for Ms. Gade. Pasquale was very good, as was Ortiz and Lewis. In summary, it was a good movie, great considering it was a sequel of the 7th generation. I have only one major complaint. Ever watch one of those movies where something shocking happens, like some irreversible injustice happens to a favorable main character, or it ends with something good happening to an irritating character when clearly something bad was supposed to happen (you know what I’m talking about)? There are certain “movie rules” which one must follow. Good people win. Bad people lose. Main characters can only die at the end of movies. The most irritating or stupid characters get killed off first in horror movies. Why? Because that’s just the way it works. There are a few exceptions, of course, like movies based on true stories, and a few other oddities, I guess. What I’m trying to say is that there are those movies where it seems like the writer deliberately does something just to break the mold and for no other reason—like it doesn’t even fit with the story. Jack was hated, but Jack won the lotto, because the audience wouldn’t like it, or it would surprise the audience. Note to writers: Stop trying so hard. Most of us are simple people (I won’t speak for all of you). Let the good guys win. Make the bad people lose. People like to see justice served. This is one of those movies where the writer didn’t always follow the rules, and it made me a little angry, like when some kids (I won’t name names) colored outside the lines when I was in kindergarten. (I still don’t understand why Miss Miller had a problem with me taking their crayons away—where is the justice in that?)


The Backwoods (Bosque de Sombras)-R for violence, language, and brief nudity. Starring Gary Oldman and Paddy Considine (Bourne Ultimatum, Hot Fuzz) Thriller/Creepy Drama. In the vein of Deliverance and Wrong Turn, a couple decides to rent a house in the backwoods of Spain. They find a girl with extremely deformed hands chained and locked in a cabin in the woods (don’t you hate that?). They attempt to rescue her, but the locals are determined to keep her in her present conditions. Sounds groovy. I had a tough time with deliverance. I liked Wrong Turn. I have loved Gary Oldman ever since True Romance. And I like Paddy Considine. The plot sounds interesting, if not contrived. BUT, the movie was not reviewed well, with critics saying that not even two good actors can save a bad film. Of course, this could be the same critics that gave terrible reviews to Alvin & the Chipmunks, saying that it was not “respectful” of the chipmunk legacy. We all know how much $$ that movie ended up making. Whoops! I’ll get back with you on this one, as I will surely see it.


Before the Devil Knows You’re Dead – R for a scene of strong graphic sexuality, nudity, violence, drug use, and language-starring Philip Seymour Hoffman, Ethan Hawke, Marisa Tomei, and Albert Finney. Suspense/Thriller. Two brothers (Hoffman, Hawke) conspire to rob their parent’s small jewelry store-an easy target, or so they think. When an accomplice decides to ignore the previously discussed rules that were in place to ensure the plan went off without a hitch, the deal goes terribly bad and the downward spiral begins. Reminiscent of the Tarantino flashback timeline, this does not start at the beginning and end at the end.



Border Lost-R For strong violence, language, some drug use, and sexual content- Starring Emilio Roso, Wes McGee, and Chris Cleveland. Action. A task force is put together to stop the crime against illegal aliens crossing the border. The operation is stopped for political reasons, and the criminal activities against the border crossers increase to drastic proportions. After an agent is murdered, a few rogue agents take matters into their own hands and seek revenge for their colleague. Well, this one just looks bad all around; from the story to the cover art, the tag line (“3 men, 2000 miles and a ton of ammo”), to the acting.


The Final Season – PG for language, thematic elements, and some teen smoking-starring Sean Astin, Powers Boothe, Rachael Leigh Cook, and James Gammon. Family/Sports. Based on a true story. One of those lovely underdog stories everyone loves, and one for the whole family. Set in a small town in Iowa, a high school baseball team must defend their record of 19 championships. When the coach is fired and quickly replaced by the young assistant coach, it seems nearly impossible… but of course, this is an underdog story… I haven’t seen it, but I’m guessing the good guys win in the end …


In the Name of the King-PG13 for intense battle sequences-Starring Jason Statham, Leelee Sobieski, Matthew Lillard, Ray Liotta, and Burt Reynolds. Action/Sci-Fi. A pack of half-man half-creatures (the Krugs) led by a wizard (Liotta), attempt to overthrow an entire kingdom. One farmer (Statham, coincidentally named Farmer), after a family tragedy brought on by the Krugs, stands up and fights with the King for vengeance, and finds he is more than he (and others) knew. Sobieski is so not good here—at all. Liotta was disappointing, not helped at all by the surrounding second-rate special effects. Statham is great. Reynolds is good. The wood ninjas were funny, but probably not supposed to be. Lillard served as comic relief, which might have been intentional, and though probably inappropriate for the movie, was enjoyable nonetheless. Overall the movie was not nearly as bad as the critics made it out to be. Statham truly did save the day, both in character in the movie and in real life in the film. It might not have been worth the full price movie ticket, but is certainly worth the rental.


Juno-PG13 for mature thematic material, sexual content, and language. Starring Ellen Page, Michael Cera, Jennifer Garner, and Jason Bateman. Offbeat Comedy. A teenage girl finds herself unexpectedly pregnant, and tries to find an adoptive couple for her baby. Normally I would be all over “offbeat” for the comedy genre. However… I happen to have 5 teenage daughters, ages 14, 16, 16, 17, and 17—so as you can imagine, I wasn’t rushing out to see a “funny” movie about teenage pregnancy. This won a few awards and was purported to be cute, well-acted, and well-written. Kudos. I fail to see how this can be remotely funny. As a foster parent and as an adoptive parent, I see the other side of the coin. I’m the person caring for those children born to the teenage girls who can’t, or won’t, take care of them. I’m the person who is witness to the aftermath, who plays cleanup to the emotional damage done, although admittedly always inadequate. I’m the person who plays intermediary between parent and child when the parent, 10 years later, decides they now have grown up and are finally able to be a responsible parent. And I’m the one receiving your tax dollars to make this possible. So, although I realize there was certainly no malice intended with the movie, if you were to look out of my window, you would not be able to see the humor, even if it were only presented in the form of intermittent comic relief. Climbing off my soap box, I will not say the movie is good or bad; I will say only that my lifestyle simply prohibits me from finding certain subject matters amusing. And that I like Jason Bateman.



Lars and the Real Girl-PG13 For some sex-related content- Starring Ryan Gosling, Emily Mortimer, Paul Schneider, Kelli Garner, and Patricia Clarkson. Comedy. This was nominated for an Academy Award for best screenplay. Lars (Gosling) has a girlfriend. Her name is Bianca. Lars is happy with Bianca. Interestingly enough, Bianca happens to be a life-sized doll. Yeah… a doll. But then Lars starts to develop this relationship with another female co-worker (a real person this time). And now Lars finds himself caught in this crazy love triangle with his girlfriend-doll and his female co-worker interest. This received some good reviews, and obviously did well at the Awards. Sounds a little odd, needless to say. Although I guess I said it anyway.

One, Two, Many: National Lampoon Presents-R for pervasive strong crude sexual content including dialogue, and for language and some drug use. Comedy/Slapstick. You know, there are, like, 25 of these National Lampoon movies. I buy them because they rent well. They look stupid, they all look like they have the same plot, the same type of actors, and the same crude and raunchy humor. I would review this, but it would be like reviewing the other 24. Here’s my quick take on this movie: If you liked the other 24, odds are you will like this one. If you didn’t like numbers 1-24, number 25 is not likely to be any better, so save the $2.99 and rent AVP: Requiem or In the Name of the King.

Retribution-R for some violent content. Starring Koji Yakusho, Manami Konishi, Manami Konishi, and Tsuyoshi Ihara. Horror. Official selection of the New York Asian Film Festival, FantAsia Film Festival, and Fantastic Fest. A young woman is found dead in a muddy puddle, but the detective assigned to the case discovers she has been drowned in sea water. The detective soon becomes the number one suspect as fingerprints and other items belonging to him are found on-scene. As more bodies turn up following the same modus operandi, the detective begins to question the link between the killer, the bodies, and the possibility of his own involvement.